网上有关“英语的笑话”话题很是火热,小编也是针对英语的笑话寻找了一些与之相关的一些信息进行分析,如果能碰巧解决你现在面临的问题,希望能够帮助到您。
关于英语的笑话
英语笑话之一
昨天来了个外国人,进到办公室,前台**左看右看,大家都在打游戏,只有自己比较清闲,就面带微笑的:"Hello?"
外国人:"Hi."
前台**:"You have what thing?"(你有什么事?)
外国人:"Can you speak Eng-lish?"(你会讲英语吗)前台**:"If I not speak English,I am speaking what?"(如果我不会说,那我现在说的'什么)
外国人:"Can anybody else speak English? "(还有谁能讲英语吗)
前台**:"You yourself look. all people are playing,no people have time,you can wait,you wait,you not wait,you go."(你自己看看,所有人都在玩呢,都没空,你愿意等就等,不愿意就走你)
外国人:"Good heavens. anybody here can speak English?"(我的上帝,这儿有谁会说英语吗)
前台**:"Shout what shout,quiet a little,you on earth have what thing."(喊什么喊,安静点,你到底有什么事)
老外:"I want to speak to your head."(我想和你的领导谈谈)
前台**:"Head not zai.You tomorrow come."(头儿不在,明再来吧)
英语笑话之二
室友:圣诞节到了,我会把袜子挂在窗户上,我希望你们能在我第二天醒来
给我一个惊喜!
我:没问题,我知道你最喜欢吃学校前门那个小面包`
我一定买来放到你的袜子里面!记得吃哈?
室友:..............
Room friend:Christmas day arrived, I can hang the sock on the window, I hoped youcan second days wake in me
For me pleasantly surprised!
I:Does not have the question, I knew you most like eating school frontdoor that young bread `
I as soon as order put to inside yours sock! Remembered eatsKazak
Room friend: ..............
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笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面我为大家带来,欢迎大家阅读!
1:
Jerry went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I'm going crazy!"
Jerry去看精神病医生。“医生,我有些不对劲。每次我上床睡觉的时候,我就觉得有人在我床底下。我都快疯了!”
"Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "e to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears."
“给我一年时间,”医生说,“每周来三次,我会治好你。”
"How much do you charge?"
“怎么收费呢?”
"A hundred dollars per visit."
“一次100美元。”
"I'll sleep on it," said Jerry.
“我会认真考虑的。”,Jerry 答道。
Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street. "Why didn't you ever e to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.
六个月以后,医生在大街上碰到Jerry。“你怎么没有再来呢?”精神病医生问道。
"For a hundred bucks a visit? The bartender cured me for $10."
“一次一百块钱吗?有个酒吧服务生收了十块钱就把我治好了。”
"Is that so! How?"
“真的?他怎么做到的?”
"He told me to cut the legs off the bed! Ain't nobody under there now!!!"
“他要我把床脚砍了!这样不就没有人在床下了吗?”
2:
Wife: Dear, you looked quite drunk last night and you kept repeating the same thing at the table.
妻子:亲爱的,你昨天晚上好像喝得很醉,在餐桌旁你不停地讲同一句话。
Hu *** and: Really? Then don't believe anything said by a drunken person. By the way, what did I say to you?
丈夫:真的吗?不要相信醉汉所说的任何事情。顺便问下,我说什么了啊?
Wife: I love you, dear.
妻子:我爱你,亲爱的。
3:
On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed.
在一辆拥挤的公交车上,一名男子注意到另一名男子闭上了眼睛。
"What's the matter? Are you sick?"
“怎么了?你不舒服?”
"No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see an old lady standing."
“不,我很好。只是我讨厌看到有个老妇站在身旁。”
4:
A man asks a trainer in the gym: "I want to impress that beautiful girl, which machine can I use?"
一名男子在健身房问他的教练:“我想给那个漂亮女孩留下深刻的印象,该使用什么机器?”
The trainer replied: "Use the ATM outside the gym!!!"
教练答道:“用健身房外的取款机!!!” ?
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